Three ways to find security with your partner in an uncertain world

2016 was to say the very least an “intense” year.

We proved to be a country that remains strongly divided. Several emotionally difficult events happened internationally and domestically. We lost too many beloved cultural icons to count.

While this is not a political or social commentary, this is unarguably a time where unpredictable events have become the norm and for whatever reason of the day.

One thing is for sure. Uncertainly is a large touchstone in our lives.

Secure and loving relationships have the power to heal, the power to make us feel safe and the power in at least one component of our lives to feel more predictable in an uncertain world.

Relationships can be defined in a variety of ways. How do we perceive and behave toward ourselves? How we show up in relationship with those we love (whomever that might be)? How do we interact with the external world at large?

Below are three ways relationship can provide safety in an unpredictable world.

Relationship with self. Live as authentically and as true to yourself as possible. Obligations are a part of life. Some obligations are non-negotiable (work, family events, taxes etc). Some obligations are negotiable. Most people know the difference.

When we live our lives with obligation as our primary filter, we are not being true to ourselves. We can get run down, tired, irritable, and depressed.

Because mind and body are one and the same, many times we even receive physical feedback when we live by obligation not being true to our nature.

The strength of the relationship we have with ourselves provides the foundation with the relationship we have with others. Living authentically gives us a strong foundation.

Relationship with others. Our brains are uniquely wired as to be in relationship. With so much power, relationship can empower us to thrive or virtually destroy us. That is why it is important to be as discerning as possible.

Perhaps it is time to grow a friendship with that neighbor who has always been so kind or time to distance from the office gossip. Maybe it is time to work to improve the relationship with have with our children or partner.

We might not have had a huge selection about who to play with when we were school aged. The nice thing about becoming an adult is enjoying the freedom to choose who gets to be in our inner circle. By embracing fulfilling relationships and attempting to repair or weed out toxic ones, we become proactive in creating a safer world for ourselves.

Relationship with the world. The world’s job seems to be to constantly reminds us that there is something bigger than ourselves. And part of what gives us purpose and gratification is how well we navigate the world at large.

Whether it is a spiritual or political practice, getting out in nature, volunteering for a cause, joining a hobby group or participating in anything under the sun that resonates with us, our relationship with the world has tremendous power to ground us in safety.

If you are experiencing relationship difficulty in any facet of your life, please know that you don’t have to do this alone. I am here to support you in creating the kind of relationship you deserve.

Call or text me at 303-475-2757, send me an email or click here to schedule your 20 minute no charge initial phone consultation. Thank you and happy new year!

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